Down around these here parts, we like to do fun things like:
cow tipping
mud riding
bottle rocket wars
lawn mower racing
bike racing
car racing
turtle racing
dog racing
rabbit racing,
baby racing
racing
We like to drive and get lost in the country on purpose.
We like to find ourselves in the middle of a cow pasture late at night - skipping over cow patties - to get to a clear spot where we can lay a blanket down so we can lay there and look at stars.
We like to blow things up. In general.
We like to roll houses, fork 'em and decorate them with flamingos at 3 AM to show our affection and appreciation for our best loved friends. We'll even help them burn the paper a few days later.
Whachall do up thar?
Friday, May 14, 2010
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
G-d helping me . . . .
G-d helping me, my inner southern belle needs to make herself more evident in my attitudes, thoughts, and actions.
I remember the attitudes of certain women I met in the South and in those who were from the South, and I really admire a lot of them. (Certainly, I met some whose attitudes and actions were certainly NOT admirable, but these are not what this is about.)
Now, I am definitelty a Westerner and a Yankee, but I am 36% southern Belle. I know this for sure: I took the test! You can take it, too -- right here!
I didn't score quite as I expected on the next test -- I got "21% Dixie. You are a dandy Yankee Doodle." That test is here.
(You might want to check this out as well.)
But this is about the word gracious.
I recognize that some of the southern ladies I have met smiled sweetly and called people "honey," but as soon (or almost as soon!) as they were out of earshot, they had some biting things to say about those people. I am also aware that some southern ladies had a special way of talking to some people that would make them think they were being complimented -- until 15 minutes later, at which time they would suddenly comprehend that they had been solidly put down, lower than a worms' belly, by a woman with the sweetest smile on earth!
But there were also Southern Ladies who were an actual study in genteelity of the most unaffected kind. They were gracious. They were noble. They came across as cultured and kind, thus the capital S and the capital L on Southern Ladies here.
Such manners were not what I learned in my first fifty years. Let me change that -- in my first 55 years. I have been (as I have mentioned before) rough-and-tumble, loving the say-what-you-mean-and-mean-what-you-say attitude, holding no courtliness -- and-proud-of-it. Daring and once wild, I embraced and coddled what I see as my semi-hippy-like demeanor, holding it boldly in the face of anyone who was put off by it.
But I started a journey some 5 years ago that took me in a different direction.
For one thing, I was raised to be a Bible-thumper, and I am a Bible-thumper. But I simply did not realize what the Bible actually says! I read it through the dark, dark glasses of what I was, rather than reading it for what it says. Furthermore, certain people who were very influential to me reinforced this with meanness and vitriol that I swallowed and lived.
But having been away from such folk, gathering information from a different set of people, I began to see something different -- a different way to live. Only then did I see what the Bible had said all along: Be nice! Be nice! Be nice! It's in the Torah. It's in the Psalms. It's in the books of the prophets. It's in the books by the apostles.
So I began to take on those ways.
Then I met a certain young southern lady who told me, "That's your inner southern belle coming through!"
She was teasing, of course, but I began to consider that those very special southern ladies were like and decided that I could take that description on as well as declaring that I am simply learning what the Bible is actually saying about how I must conduct my life.
So fine! I am better off now for seeing how the Bible says I ought to act and trying to follow it, but I am also learning from the southern ladies -- the real Southern Ladies -- regarding how I can carry out biblical principles. I am sure the L-rd won't mind!
I remember the attitudes of certain women I met in the South and in those who were from the South, and I really admire a lot of them. (Certainly, I met some whose attitudes and actions were certainly NOT admirable, but these are not what this is about.)
Now, I am definitelty a Westerner and a Yankee, but I am 36% southern Belle. I know this for sure: I took the test! You can take it, too -- right here!
I didn't score quite as I expected on the next test -- I got "21% Dixie. You are a dandy Yankee Doodle." That test is here.
(You might want to check this out as well.)
But this is about the word gracious.
I recognize that some of the southern ladies I have met smiled sweetly and called people "honey," but as soon (or almost as soon!) as they were out of earshot, they had some biting things to say about those people. I am also aware that some southern ladies had a special way of talking to some people that would make them think they were being complimented -- until 15 minutes later, at which time they would suddenly comprehend that they had been solidly put down, lower than a worms' belly, by a woman with the sweetest smile on earth!
But there were also Southern Ladies who were an actual study in genteelity of the most unaffected kind. They were gracious. They were noble. They came across as cultured and kind, thus the capital S and the capital L on Southern Ladies here.
Such manners were not what I learned in my first fifty years. Let me change that -- in my first 55 years. I have been (as I have mentioned before) rough-and-tumble, loving the say-what-you-mean-and-mean-what-you-say attitude, holding no courtliness -- and-proud-of-it. Daring and once wild, I embraced and coddled what I see as my semi-hippy-like demeanor, holding it boldly in the face of anyone who was put off by it.
But I started a journey some 5 years ago that took me in a different direction.
For one thing, I was raised to be a Bible-thumper, and I am a Bible-thumper. But I simply did not realize what the Bible actually says! I read it through the dark, dark glasses of what I was, rather than reading it for what it says. Furthermore, certain people who were very influential to me reinforced this with meanness and vitriol that I swallowed and lived.
But having been away from such folk, gathering information from a different set of people, I began to see something different -- a different way to live. Only then did I see what the Bible had said all along: Be nice! Be nice! Be nice! It's in the Torah. It's in the Psalms. It's in the books of the prophets. It's in the books by the apostles.
So I began to take on those ways.
Then I met a certain young southern lady who told me, "That's your inner southern belle coming through!"
She was teasing, of course, but I began to consider that those very special southern ladies were like and decided that I could take that description on as well as declaring that I am simply learning what the Bible is actually saying about how I must conduct my life.
So fine! I am better off now for seeing how the Bible says I ought to act and trying to follow it, but I am also learning from the southern ladies -- the real Southern Ladies -- regarding how I can carry out biblical principles. I am sure the L-rd won't mind!
Sunday, April 25, 2010
Fred Meyer vs. Piggly Wiggly
Do you have Piggly Wiggly stores up there in the North?
They're probably extremely different actually. Piggly Wiggly is more a grocery store than anything and if I remember right, Fred Meyer has a little of everything ...like a Super Target? Please correct me if I'm wrong, I've only been in a town with a Fred Meyer in it once and we didn't go there. I only heard about it.
Shopping. I must confess that I enjoy it at times. I prefer to go knowing what I'm looking for so that I can get in and get out. There is the rare occasion that I go simply to window shop, but I really have to be in a mood. Shopping for someone else can be fun. Shopping for me can get quickly depressing and make me want to jump out of a size 16 window, but whadoya do?
So how does my southern shopping differ from shopping in the north? Probably doesn't. I dunno, I haven't really shopped in the north. Hmmmm, I should try that some time.
Friday, April 23, 2010
Question: What is a southern lady's most developed muscle?
The flexor digitorum superficialis -- the muscle used to flex the forefinger upon the nozzle of the hair spray.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Today
10 days ago.... 3, maybe 4 inches of snow on the ground.
Today...... cloudless, 86 degrees with very strong winds. I'm just sayin. I think we're swinging back to balanced weather.
Today...... cloudless, 86 degrees with very strong winds. I'm just sayin. I think we're swinging back to balanced weather.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Forgive me! Please!
Forgive me! I haven't had time to read or write lately! Not even now! But I thought this was hilarious!
See this. Hilarious!
See this. Hilarious!
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Weird-O Weather Woes
Ok! What's up with our weather huh?
Tzav, my pal, I do believe we've traded places again.
Friday: 75 degrees and a beautiful cloudless sky to enjoy with perfect breezes
Saturday: Temp drops to mid 60s, severe weather...later that evening, SNOW and 32 degrees. 1 inch or less they tell us. Dangerously windy.
Sunday: I wake up to 3 inches of snow on the ground and more falling, temps in the mid 30s and still very scary wind. This afternoon, it's melting, closer to mid 40s and I can see the grass a little now. Wind is blowing so hard that when it gusts, the blinds on the sliding glass door bump into my table. Woah that's windy.
Normal weather this time of year is upper 60's -mid 70s... I think it should be back to normal later this week. The snow is beautiful, but I want to wear my capris and flip-flops again!
Tzav, I know you're a busy bee. When you get a chance, will you please tell me what the weather norm is in your section of the country? Has it been normal this year for yous guys?
Tzav, my pal, I do believe we've traded places again.
Friday: 75 degrees and a beautiful cloudless sky to enjoy with perfect breezes
Saturday: Temp drops to mid 60s, severe weather...later that evening, SNOW and 32 degrees. 1 inch or less they tell us. Dangerously windy.
Sunday: I wake up to 3 inches of snow on the ground and more falling, temps in the mid 30s and still very scary wind. This afternoon, it's melting, closer to mid 40s and I can see the grass a little now. Wind is blowing so hard that when it gusts, the blinds on the sliding glass door bump into my table. Woah that's windy.
Normal weather this time of year is upper 60's -mid 70s... I think it should be back to normal later this week. The snow is beautiful, but I want to wear my capris and flip-flops again!
Tzav, I know you're a busy bee. When you get a chance, will you please tell me what the weather norm is in your section of the country? Has it been normal this year for yous guys?
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